Burns Forever / Discussion

This is the discussion related to the wiki page Burns Forever.

Almarduk 28 Oct 2022 22:50

Many thanks for C-Graph for their greenlight.

Brilliant, +1

scutoid studios 28 Oct 2022 23:01

I saw this as a draft, and I appreciated its sleek and subtle use of fancy CSS, and it's collapsible, unintruisive content warning.

The CSS basically works on mobile, but I'd love to help make a mobile-oriented version of the "yellow" thing that displays on mobile it you'd like!

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You promised you'd take me there again some day… but you never did.

DysfunctionalCabinet 29 Oct 2022 12:05

very yellow

Sariastuff 30 Oct 2022 19:50

Wake up babe new best tale just dropped

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There are roads,
a samurai must travel…

userunhacked 03 Nov 2022 18:05

holy saria i thouht you were gone

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+1 and constructive criticism

Natedagreat563 01 Nov 2022 18:04

This tale is definitely one of the best ones I’ve seen on site. I knew it was going to be good the minute I saw Spanglish included (algún artículo que incluye ambos inglés y español probablemente va a ser muy bueno ;).

One thing I think could have been improved upon is the exposition and the side character. The opening is very good with imagery and characterization, but I notice the protagonist’s companion appears to be quickly cast to the wayside after the protagonist’s entry into the Backrooms. I feel like this would’ve been a more prominent plot point given how close the two appeared to be. Comments here and there concerned about what she’s thinking, if she knows she’s even gone, etc. I also may have missed it, but it appeared to be unclear exactly who said companion was. Was it the sister? A friend? I wasn’t sure.

This is a very minor, insignificant issue however that I only noticed after my third read through and pondering the article for a bit on a walk. Overall, the imagery and storytelling is fantastic. I’m in extremely strong opposition to minimalism and short stories as a concept because they’re almost never done right and come off as either underdeveloped or dry in nature, but I think this is probably one of the rare exceptions where it is executed near perfectly. Very good job. You definitely earned my upvote.

Good content.

Tomuuu 04 Nov 2022 03:02

Really enjoyable and contains a very nice prompt. +1

i dont understand

(account deleted) 16 Feb 2023 22:29

what exactly is happening in the tale?

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hi it is me aaron92

Re: i dont understand

Almarduk 13 Mar 2023 22:58

A character with xanthophobia takes up an unpleasant job (see content warning) to survive. This messes with her mentally, so she starts perceiving things oddly. Then she finds a copy of a room she's familiar with somehow inside the Backrooms with a cassette playing her favorite song, which brings her back to reality.

I'm not sure if that's what you meant or if something else was confusing.

I really appreciate the vote but also recommend not upvoting if you don't know what's going on.

Re: i dont understand

(account deleted) 13 Mar 2023 23:19

ok thank you

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hi it is me aaron92