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one more red nightmare - king crimson
reupload of level 84… now it is Eight Hundre Fourty One….. Waooww…. hope you guys like it as much as you used to :) (to clarify this is an uneditied reupload so old gl still applies iirc!!)
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captaiin
i've got that friday night fever, sometimes a man just needs a breather
It's back! +1 ig but my only problem with the page is this sentence:
You may also enter from Planum 18, if you try hard enough.
This sentence feels a bit unnatural and could be described in a little bit more detail.
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Good point! I’ll fix that once I’m back at my computer, thank you for pointing it out!
i've got that friday night fever, sometimes a man just needs a breather
Okay, so I have a few problems with this level.
The first is that it's way too short. I'm no judge when it comes to exactly how long a level article should be, but to the very least it should be a decent length enough to leave an impact on your reader and this one does not achieve that.
On the content of the article itself- we are given only the vaguest idea of what the level actually is, the marble statue thing while cool isn't really expanded upon at all and would've been an interesting thing to delve into, we're not even given an idea on how you're supposed to traverse and/or prepare for this level, which is what the article should have been mainly about.
This article also breaks the analytical tone of what level articles usually have but has nothing to offer in return. In this case, it just feels that the article opts for a flowery narration just so it has a superficial way of standing out, but you can only really get away with breaks like that if they serve a purpose. What does the flowery narration add to the article that wouldn't be there if you used the standard analytical prose?
And on another thing: addressing the reader is just a gimmick. And gimmicks only work well, as I said, if it serves a purpose. This particular type has been done to death and is very hard to pull off well in most circumstances. This is no exception: it doesn't do anything for the article and rather just feels like a cheap attempt at a fourth wall scare.
Overall this suffers from many issues I have with other articles; flowery narration that breaks from the prose has been done in dozens of articles already and I've only really seen one that has done it remotely well. The whole "directly addressing the reader" bit has been done moreso and pulled off decently even less.
When it comes to level articles you're not just creating a short story, you're helping build up a world. So you gotta ask, "what exactly is interesting about this part of the world I'm building?".
As harsh as I've been with this I will say: this idea HAS potential. A liminal museum that assimilates people into marble statues sounds cool, and would have been better executed if you framed the article through information coming from wanderers viewing in and slipping out.
When it comes to level articles you're not just creating a short story, you're helping build up a world.
This is..not really true. A level article doesn't need to focus on world-building. A level article can be like a tale. World-building is only one aspect of a level but ignoring the other options you have would be kind of lame in this scenario. Using a level as a backdrop to tell a story or to create a well written atmosphere shouldn't devalue the page as a piece of writing. If every level page was just focused on adding more to the backrooms as a setting this site would get boring fast.
And on another thing: addressing the reader is just a gimmick
Sure, but there's nothing inherently wrong with using a gimmick in an article. I think honestly it's done quite well here because it doesn't stick out as this major idea or moment. It's thrown in which I actually kind of like because unlike when it's usually done it actually catches the reader by surprise here.
flowery narration that breaks from the prose has been done in dozens of articles already
Why is it bad for an article to break from pre-established ideas of what an article should do? I don't understand the fixation on having everything fall into nice uniform lines. Why not encourage things which break norms? Why not get creative with ideas? Why force people to fall into these lame norms with their writing.
The first is that it's way too short
I will stand by the fact the length of an article does not matter as much as it's quality of writing. Hell, in recent months I've found myself enjoying short articles because I don't have to spend a big ass time investment reading them. Sometimes it's nice to read a quick, short thing which leaves you feeling something or throws in nice prose without needing to drag it's feet on including major story beats. Sure, short articles can be underdeveloped but this article isn't some clinical thing trying to portray information. This is trying to give a feeling, and it does that.
we're not even given an idea on how you're supposed to traverse and/or prepare for this level
And why is this information nessecary for a narrative-centric article? It seems like unnecessary details which would just make the article feel bloated.
article opts for a flowery narration just so it has a superficial way of standing out
Or it's just a different style of article from other things on the site? It's not like narrative articles are particularly uncommon. Maybe the author just didn't want to write a traditional clinical article. Why does it have to be about attention seeking?
Tldr: narrative cool poetry cool levels shouldn't have to be big world building projects.
With all due respect, your primary arguments boil down to "there's no harm in it".
While that is certainly true that's not conducive to writing a good or engaging article.
Let me reiterate some of my points:
Why is it bad for an article to break from pre-established ideas of what an article should do? I don't understand the fixation on having everything fall into nice uniform lines. Why not encourage things which break norms? Why not get creative with ideas? Why force people to fall into these lame norms with their writing.
My problem isn't just that this article does flowery prose, it's that the prose doesn't serve a higher function When you "get creative and break from the norm" of something that has a preestablished format/tone you need to do it in a way that serves the narrative of what you are writing.
Taking another wiki as an example, some SCP articles break from the highly-scientific and analytical tone despite that site's stricter standards, but whenever it does it pretty much ALWAYS serves a purpose such as, for example, designed to lure in an SCP that like reading about itself (SCP 3393), talks about something that cant be described (SCP 055), or something that destroys anything describing it (SCP 2521). Otherwise, it sticks out in a way that does NOT reflect well on it when compared to other traditional articles or other articles that break from the norm in a better-executed fashion.
This is..not really true. A level article doesn't need to focus on world-building. A level article can be like a tale. World-building is only one aspect of a level but ignoring the other options you have would be kind of lame in this scenario. Using a level as a backdrop to tell a story or to create a well written atmosphere shouldn't devalue the page as a piece of writing. If every level page was just focused on adding more to the backrooms as a setting this site would get boring fast.
You ARE worldbuidling when you write a level. You are expanding the backrooms, adding onto a part of its world, setting, and sometimes even characters. That is par of the course when you are describing a part of a setting.
With all due respect, why would you write a level article and then barely talk about the level itself? If that's the case then what's stopping you from making a tale instead where it would fit better?
Nobody is saying you CAN'T write a Level as a background for some sort of higher narrative there are tons of levels on the site that do it really well. For example Level 148 The Living Level mainly serves as the background for the conflict between Knox and the Level itself but fully fleshes itself out as a setting.
Or Level 11 which is similarly vague and written in a different format but gives you enough clues and details to sparse out what it truly is: a Lotus Eater Machine that actively draws in wanderers and messes with any attempts to truly describe itself.
Again in comparison this level isn't all that well fleshed out and we have no idea what the place itself is like or how wanderers interact with it.
And why is this information nessecary for a narrative-centric article? It seems like unnecessary details which would just make the article feel bloated.
See my previous point but also: the framing device of not just the Level articles but the site itself is that it's a database made up of a collection of information on levels, entities, events, etc..
The very point of Level articles is that they tell you what it's like, what's happening there, and how people interact with the level. Again, it's definitely possible to make it narrative-focused without neglecting that (see my previous examples).
Sure, but there's nothing inherently wrong with using a gimmick in an article. I think honestly it's done quite well here because it doesn't stick out as this major idea or moment. It's thrown in which I actually kind of like because unlike when it's usually done it actually catches the reader by surprise here.
Yes, as I said a gimmick CAN work if executed properly. But here? It's sort of just slapped into the article with no real build up or effort to integrate it into the narrative of the article itself. It doesn't work here for the same reason why jumpscares in horror are rarely considered above cheap unless done well:
It's easily slapped together, insertable into anything, and easy to pull off without much thought. After that initial read/jumpscare? There is no real impact to it.
You need to actively build up to something like that and even then it won't work in most circumstances unless specifically tailored to it. (See: SCP-001 Scrantron where it builds up on itself and waits until the very end to reveal the reader/site themselves is SCP-001 or again Level 11)
I will stand by the fact the length of an article does not matter as much as it's quality of writing. Hell, in recent months I've found myself enjoying short articles because I don't have to spend a big ass time investment reading them. Sometimes it's nice to read a quick, short thing which leaves you feeling something or throws in nice prose without needing to drag it's feet on including major story beats. Sure, short articles can be underdeveloped but this article isn't some clinical thing trying to portray information. This is trying to give a feeling, and it does that.
And I will stand by another point: this article is far too brief. Too brief to really leave an impact too regardless of what it's going for, and if what it's going for is what you say it is then it shouldn't be a level as opposed to a tale.
Again in creating a level you're trying to expand the world of the backrooms. If you aren't interested in doing that at all, then what's the point in making a level as opposed to a tale or other kind of article? That's like if you made an SCP article that barely includes the SCP in question outside of like one or two vague descriptors.
I wrote a long ass reply for this but it got deleted so fuck it here's a tldr
With all due respect, your primary arguments boil down to "there's no harm in it".
No, my argument is that you shouldn't need to have some long, in depth, clinically written or narratively written with a great explanation for it within an article. Articles should be able to be short prose pieces. It's not "there's no harm" it's "I like this, and I think it should be actively explored as a way of writing for the wiki"
Or Level 11 which is similarly vague and written in a different format but gives you enough clues and details to sparse out what it truly is: a Lotus Eater Machine that actively draws in wanderers and messes with any attempts to truly describe itself.
Unironically confused about this because level 11 is 1.
Not written in a different format
2. Not a lotus eater machine (whatever that means)
Are you speaking of another article??
Epic, here’s what a lotus-eater machine is; https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/LotusEaterMachine
Correction: for some reason mixed up Level 11 with Level 14, my bad.
No, my argument is that you shouldn't need to have some long, in depth, clinically written or narratively written with a great explanation for it within an article. Articles should be able to be short prose pieces. It's not "there's no harm" it's "I like this, and I think it should be actively explored as a way of writing for the wiki"
And I'm saying a Level article should actually talk about the level. It doesn't have to be some deep clinically written bit, it just has to have that as the focus or at least be fleshed out well enough to serve as a backdrop for the greater narrative in question- which this one does not do.
If you want short prose pieces, then why write a Level article? The whole point about them is that they're about the weird and strange places people document and send to the MEG (or whatever group the format is). Why would you write for something whose primary aspect is building up a setting and then not do that. That is like writing an SCP article and then barely talking about the SCP outside of a brief moment of poetic text.
Alternatively, if a level does use prose, it should at least serve some purpose in deviating from the expected format. Again, for example, many SCPs and even at least one other level does that because it ties in narratively to the subject of what is written- It serves a purpose, it enhances the experience reading it because it ties into what is written thematically, and it makes the article stand out on its own.
Either way, this feels like a general disagreement as to what a Level should be like.
I don't even dislike this Level in concept- there are a ton of genuinely fascinating ideas brought up in the prose itself. I just think it executed it in an unengaging uninteresting way.
This article was very nice. The prose was great and the concept is captivating and interesting. A great short read. Ez +1
Finally, this was one of my favorite levels when it was taken down, and I'm very happy to see it back! Just one question, are you going to re-add its sub level (Post-Metamorphosis was it's name I'm prettty sure) too?
Prett sure he will, but he said that he will be focusing on stuff relating to his goi (captain's crew)
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Absolutely! I’ve sorta just been mulling around whether I should post it or not, but it is still greenlit from back in the old days. I added a line or two, so I might run it by some folks first, but overall it’s ready to go :)
i've got that friday night fever, sometimes a man just needs a breather
I don´t understand what is happening here. Can someone explain me?
Hi! Speaking as staff here. Please do not use the "r word". It's extremely derogatory towards disabled persons and as both staff and a disabled person I ask that you at the least edit your post to not include it. Thank you!
— captaiin
i've got that friday night fever, sometimes a man just needs a breather
Ok I´ll edit
